We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize