Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Adam has been drinking

  (1-810): View more from Michigan

  Who has his phone

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Adam does

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  (810): Adam has been drinking (1-810): Who has his phone (810): Adam does http://tfl.nu/tl53
  Replies (15) Good night (7902) Bad night (877)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long

  (1-604): View more from British Columbia

  wtf you measured my hair?

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  (604): found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long (1-604): wtf you measured my hair? http://tfl.nu/f3a1
  Replies (20) Good night (1455) Bad night (4605)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?

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  (949): i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph? http://tfl.nu/h05l
  Replies (42) Good night (8497) Bad night (991)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?

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  (636): Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later? http://tfl.nu/o4ww
  Replies (19) Good night (1321) Bad night (4759)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.

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  (904): Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it. http://tfl.nu/tda5
  Replies (10) Good night (6418) Bad night (1016)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.

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  (618): It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over. http://tfl.nu/n4d4
  Replies (43) Good night (1198) Bad night (8922)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers

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  (910): I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers http://tfl.nu/vom9
  Replies (16) Good night (1207) Bad night (5325)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light

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  (203): Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light http://tfl.nu/z2qb
  Replies (5) Good night (2139) Bad night (1236)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples

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  (641): Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples http://tfl.nu/d5pz
  Replies (3) Good night (627) Bad night (1784)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus

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  (248): My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus http://tfl.nu/w26d
  Replies (1) Good night (600) Bad night (972)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable

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  (916): Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable http://tfl.nu/5q9j
  Replies (5) Good night (869) Bad night (1263)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.

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  (512): Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand. http://tfl.nu/mrxq
  Replies (5) Good night (522) Bad night (940)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it

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  (805): There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it http://tfl.nu/82im
  Replies (6) Good night (1288) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.

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  (707): I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made. http://tfl.nu/x9xf
  Replies (1) Good night (641) Bad night (369)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet

  (770): View more from Georgia

  What is my life?

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  (901): The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet (770): What is my life? http://tfl.nu/abv3
  Replies (3) Good night (435) Bad night (515)

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