Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket. http://tfl.nu/78sj
  Replies (27) Good night (2001) Bad night (3446)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish http://tfl.nu/f18y
  Replies (17) Good night (8403) Bad night (911)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!' http://tfl.nu/csk1
  Replies (34) Good night (5924) Bad night (1184)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  I have another pimple on my ass cheek.

  (420): View more from

  I'll be there in 10 minutes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): I have another pimple on my ass cheek. (420): I'll be there in 10 minutes. http://tfl.nu/3vda
  Replies (25) Good night (1100) Bad night (7985)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love. http://tfl.nu/9dmy
  Replies (37) Good night (4992) Bad night (2853)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it http://tfl.nu/n58g
  Replies (16) Good night (3486) Bad night (1538)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend. http://tfl.nu/u6sb
  Replies (7) Good night (2801) Bad night (610)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck. http://tfl.nu/2tgn
  Replies (7) Good night (1976) Bad night (801)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook http://tfl.nu/40z7
  Replies (25) Good night (2660) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN" http://tfl.nu/vt0o
  Replies (7) Good night (1177) Bad night (646)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure. http://tfl.nu/rbiy
  Replies (4) Good night (465) Bad night (960)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas

  (1-918): View more from Oklahoma

  I thank god almighty everyday

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas (1-918): I thank god almighty everyday http://tfl.nu/mbi3
  Replies (18) Good night (1500) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms. http://tfl.nu/5i1h
  Replies (7) Good night (783) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina? http://tfl.nu/kffk
  Replies (9) Good night (800) Bad night (490)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker http://tfl.nu/s38c
  Replies (0) Good night (490) Bad night (309)

Randomize