Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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