Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I would fuck him just for his dog
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
