two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
