he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
dude. I can hear the air.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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