I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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