i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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