I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
