im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
