he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize