I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Ketchup is God's man juice
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
