Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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