That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
