im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
