I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
