I think my vagina is haunted
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
If its not for food we ain't going out.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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