i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
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