JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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