if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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