just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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