Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize