i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I can't put those talents on a resume
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
