I am puke
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize