wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
