i think my mom watched the whole time
it hurts more in the daytime
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
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