So drunk, too bad you don't want this
another moral hangover. fuck.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
