I'm so fucking centered right now
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
