You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
