so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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