When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize