Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize