Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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