she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
