we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
