I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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