You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
