i wish semen tasted like chocolate
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
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We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
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I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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