he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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