so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Randomize
