at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize