I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
