He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
