Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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