are you so shy because you have an std?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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