I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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