I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
