remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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