last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
