omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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