I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos